happy birthday baby sister

"you will always be my baby..."

*inside joke between Ana, mama and i.* When she (ana) was young, i always was her baby sitter, and PTA attender. by the time i started working, i used to take her everywhere i go, whether i was shopping, in the spa, in the gym and even on my dates (to my then boyfriend's amusement).
she was my pretend baby/child. i took her to see her first cinema (Lion King), her first disco, her first drinking spree and cigarette puff (i was a cool "ate",lol).
so when she was about 11 or 12 years old, my mom and i played a prank on her. we sat her down for a serious talk and told her in my dramatic voice that in reality,she was my daughter and had my mom pretend she was hers because i was too young for a scandal. Ana didnt know how to react whether she wanted to be happy or to be sad, she looked at my mom for comfort but my mom nodded in agreement to my faux revelation..but then we couldn't stop laughing, and i'm sure Ana heaved a sigh of relief when she realized it was one (ugly) prank we gave her.


on mother's day this year, she sent me a message online to say " happy mothers' day Ate..love, your pretend daughter".. this made me laugh out loud.

This entry is to say how much she is treasured and adored by everyone in our family.

More than anything, she is a gift to my life...in fact, to my entire family's life. Needless to say, Ana, Angkai, Tita Nana, -- is loved by her ate's, kuya's , cousins , mama and im sure, papa in heaven is missing her too.

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I was so happy that we had the opportunity to skype tonight (which is her birthday already as its already the 24th in cebu). Adrian and i sang "happy birthday" to her while she was at work.

Grateful for technology-- which makes distance seem a lot bearable.


and grateful for this space where my heart can load off some of the giddiness it could not handle.

have an awesome day, loves. 

Jotting my happies

Norwhich city ;-)

Things/events/people that made me happy the last few days:

- yesterdays jap lunch ( we overindulged as usual). sashimi octopus is yum!

-my niece today on skype saying "hi tita chelo, four na baya ko. good night and bye!" while she hastily interrupted my skype conversation with mama.

-Norwhich..shopping!

-my niece enrolled in kindergarten.

-(on skype) my niece, prepped by my sister about the impending bullies in school, her tita Ana said "what will you say when kids at school will call you "ahh you're fat!""..

Dominique flipped her hair and said "no, i'm gwapa and sexy". (Hahaha!)

Tita Ana: "but what will you do after"?

"be nice to them and still say "hello, and good morning!", Dominique said.

(well taught by the tita who went through the same thing in school like myself ,lol).

-make-up haul!

-Adrian indulging me.

-friends who leave messages despite their busy schedules and their troubles at home, just to check if im ok.

-tea and scones in my little cottage.

-Lydia and her family.

-seeing my old colleagues in facebook, who after all these years, never forget.

-Ana blogging.. because when i read her, i feel she's just near. (thank you Ana, i know you do it for me)

-Ana's lovely news about her creative endeavours.

-friends who are nice to my family. you know who you are. (what you do for my family, you do for me 100x).

-friends and family who are indulging in their passions. i see them travel, do well at work, finish long personal projects and still never forget to connect. i love that. thank you.

-Ruby back at the house.

-my brothers happy with their married lives. they are such loyal, loving men to their wives, i'm proud of them.

-my job. oh how i love it.  and because i know i'm very good at what i do. it just is my sanity saver from being too homesick.

-Adrian's family. they are lovely and such awesome loving people.

-mama. and she will be here a week from today. (yayyy!)


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please list down things that made you happy the last few days. let's share notes.

grateful for these blessings.

when you miss when you shouldn't

let me first start this entry by appreciating the beauty of the weekend that we just had. beautiful weather,  lovely experiences with some awesome friends who came by to spend the weekend at our tiny home.

truly a beautiful weekend that was.

monday was a bank holiday, thus tuesday started as the first day of work. work is not really work when the company sends you to a three day training, and finishes early enough to come home to sunshine and finding your husband getting you a nice snack as a homecoming present and lets you 'nap' in the sofa, because he knows how sleep is a problem for you.

i felt really emotional all of a sudden, because of the beautiful weather, and the wonderfulness of the people you deal with day-to-day. i missed cebu, because our trainor was talking about how he lived in cebu for a a few months to dive. i was proud, of course, of my beautiful island.

then the drive back to home was passing by beautiful fields of flowers and hills and oh, just indescribably beautiful. i just miss the people i love, because i wish so much i could share this with them. (soon, soon).

then i realised, it must be the time of the month where my hormones turn me into a mush of dramatic emotions. i become such an emotional sop whenever i am hormonal. i crave for foods which could lead me to an early death, and i am missing my family more than i normally do, and i am missing some few people i shouldn't miss.

still, i am happy, i get through these emotions. otherwise, i'd be back to my 'focused, goal-orientated, robot-like-devoid-of-human-emotion' person i sometimes see myself to be. (ok, exaggeration on the robot-like, haha, but i can be very too focused on certain goals that i blank out all other feelings that could distract me.)

well,well, i am human after all.

**

thank you to you my lovely friends who still visit this blog, even though the cobwebs are evident and that the owner has been very neglectful to write down things.

lately, i have been very unmotivated to write things down but then my sister Ana has inspired me to write again. she told me in her email that she was writing again for me, to make me happy and to inspire me. how awesome is that from your much missed sister? *dabbing away tears* (and thank you to friends who support my sister in your own ways, whatever you do for her, you do for me 100x).

***

how are you,lately? 

caged..but in a happy way

(photo: a caged dancer in Taste of London Festival)

the weather is playing funny beans at the moment.

on wednesday, it gave us a taster of what spring is like, and although winter is so beautiful to the eyes, its a pain when you have to get up early in the morning to go to work and go visit patient's houses as a job.

(side note: although i go out and about for my job, and yes, it is a pain to be out in the cold, but because we live in the beautiful part of Norfolk, i get to visit the most beautiful cottages. houses and even manors that have amazing old ancient fireplaces. makes you pinch yourself if indeed you are in sleep and dreaming like a part of english books).

last night, just as adrian and i thought of having a picnic (and call friends) for a little picnic at the Sandringham grounds, the news dropped a bomber and forwarned us with snow showers. we thought, maybe it may not happen.

this morning, i woke up to frost in the garden again. it wasn't sad, but it's just the beautiful european weather telling us to wait for spring to finally stay and announce its arrival in full force.

for now, im cooped up in the house, in my dressing gown still. but happy that there is an unlimited supply of filtered ground coffee, cream tea and hot choco with mallows (my choice!) to run to when i have the chills.

for now, i'll enjoy this excuse to be indoors. read books that have been loaned to me from last week, catch up on emails, skype bestfriends..better yet, read blogs--and blog! 

keep warm, loves.

and so it is christmas

..and it is very merry.

this christmas had so many flops and mishaps that enumerating them is now just defeating the purpose of this entry.

this christmas as i was working on the eve (trying to be good, so i am allowed a LOOONG leave next year..*please cross your fingers for me). (the only good thing was, work wasn't too hard on the eve. there were no emergency catastrophes, nor a mass stroke epidemic in the county, so we were allowed to leave an hour than normal home time, or they were. i guess, the more your responsibility is, the last you leave the ship, so i basically left just about quarter an hour than normal..LOL).

we had my stepson Mark with us for the christmas period and will be delivering him back to Essex on boxing day,where we are spending back London way where my brother-in-law's house is.

so on the 24th, Adrian picked me up from work, and we went home, had a drink in the pub. the boys stayed longer in the pub while i went home earlier than they did as i had to freshen up and cook some of the noche buena food.

we stayed up til 5 AM. watched DVDs and drank wine/choco drink and ate chcolates til we felt like bursting.

this christmas, i am thankful for so many things/events and people. (i will do a separate "thank you" post for the pressies that my lovely friends gave me because i cannot give it to them personally).

for now, some photos of the night we welcomed christmas..

noche buena for three. 

cheese platter, pigs in blanket, gammon, salad, crisps,

smoked salmon, twiglets, 

assortment party food: breaded prawns, prawn toast, dimsum, cold cuts, 

sausages and steamed prawns.

(and chocolates, and cakes)

christmas tree.

blessings and love to you all.. <3 nbsp="nbsp">

**

let me wish you beautful memories to build on for christmasses to come.

purpose

lotus man...tamil nadu,india (2010)

listening to your calling,giving in to your purpose --is hearing out your own soul speak to you.

Mika turned 3

my niece Dominique or Mika (sometimes Dom) just turned 3.

she had a strawberry shortcake themed party at her lola's home (my mothers') where she invited her cousins and some neighbours' children to partake of her small party.

it was a very simple party, (kids are so easily pleased,they can never tell an expensive party from a cheap one,haha) all that matters to her was that she was fed and had a beautiful cake and had little kids over to celebrate with her and her mom and dad.

photos from my sister and cousin Ruby Mae ;-)

cake from the fabulous The Cupcake Theory...Thank you Ninang Arvy Lopez ;-)

look at her happy face

it was a simple party to celebrate our little Domdom

she is the only baby in the family

She had wonderful guests,too;-)

Family..

cousin Apollo

Tita Ninang Kharla

Tita Texy

Uncle Victor and Uncle Boy.. her lolos

giving a warm hug to her tita Kharla.

**

our little Mika has a mind of her own when dressing. she has shoe fetish (keeps asking me to buy her 'boots' and socks over skype ), and her taste in dressing reminded me of something i photographed on the catwalk.

**

thank you to Mika's tita Nana who was organizer and part benefactor of the birthday party.. <3

you did a great job tita Ana ;-)

short story

on monday afternoon, after work,as i was just coming out of the changing room to change from our uniform to civies, my colleague asked me why i wasn't in shorts, (everyone seemed to know what the weather is like in the morning that they seem to know when to don shorts in the afternoon or not if its raining).

she, even in her 6 months pregnancy glory has the most beautiful skinny legs and our other colleague who had nice legs herself were asking whether it wasn't warm enough for me for shorts (because i come from a hot country?). i said, "no,i just didn't think of wearing shorts because we plan to go to the town centre after work."

she said "so?".

ok, i felt it was a bit too revealing to walk from the hospital building in my shorts to the car and where i could be seen by my other colleagues, but i lied "i didn't shave my legs". and that seemed to have shut her up (because all of them shave their legs/ a national pre-requisite in summer for all short-wearing female this side of civilization).

in truth, i do not shave my legs. i do not have/get hair in my legs at all. (logical, since i do not have much hair on my head, it would have been too unfair of God to have given me hairy legs,wouldn't it?) i pluck an odd hair every now and again on the lateral side of my calf muscle, but a very fine feathery one, the most. i just dont get hairs on my legs at all. (this is a positive,right?LOL). and i suppose,most filipina women dont, unless they have a mestisa blood (i know,coz some of my cousins do).

truth number 2--- i have no shorts to wear. i do not say this in "woe me, pity party-mode", because the reason is,all my shorts are quite loose at the moment and the last thing i want to do is keep buying clothes i have no intention of keeping. (wais si lumen!). i was planning on a shopping spree when i get to my goal (i am getting there, i promise you,i will!).

case en pointe, this photo. i wore my old shorts one warm weekend to a walk in the town.

these were mid thigh high shorts last year, now, its more "puruntong" .

in this photo, this was rolled in the waist to hold it tight and i have to not suck my stomach in (in fact i had to do the opposite), just so the short stays in place (haha)..

i regret going to town with it,because it kept falling off my hips. it was a great feeling: a reminder of some changes my body has undergone, but also, an accident waiting to happen, that you dont wish to occur having your trousers/shorts on your ankles in broad daylight in the middle of the town. (ahh,these things you only think of once you're out of the house).


but then again, maybe, its high time i should start buying shorts as summer seem to have shown its face (at last!). i am not talking about those micro 'pek-pek' shorts that i see on young beautiful skinny things,no!. i am just talking about those things that are non-denim, (or maybe denim),lightweight material, cut above the knee, or mid-thigh (enough to show some definition and separation between my quadriceps,and enough to leave dignity for a woman of my age,harhar). Shorts that can be seen that: a) i am orientated to the season.. b)i did shave my legs!

***

Addendum:


Some photos of me two years ago (August 2010)..in India and Dubai.

cute!..the elephant,too! ;-) PS. the elephant is the one lying on its side. the one washing it has no relation to elephant whatsoever.

in Dubai airport in 2010 waiting for our flight back to the UK. i could still wear the top until this day (fabulously loose as it was intended,haha), but last year, i couldn't fit into those linen trousers. now, those same ones (linen trousers) are just too lose for my sense of security (haha).. i chucked those trousers to a sealed box in a garage in london at the moment as it might be more beneficial to someone from my relatives who do not mind Marks&Spencer linen trouser hand-me-downs.


**

I enjoy looking at old photos of me before.. it reminds me to keep going.

how about you? what are you trying to get motivated with?x

pre graduation night

monday early evening, the 16th.

we travelled all the way from norfolk to essex, to stay at a friends' house. the same friends who were coming in to witness my graduation because i already paid for two other tickets for my mom and my sister (who by the way could not make it--ahh,well, plans).

it was nearer to leave from their house to my university, which could take an hour in a good traffic. (because of the olympics traffic however, it took as 15 minutes longer to get to uni the next day).

we arrived expecting just two of my friends in their house, but i wasnt expecting another friend and her partner to be there,too.

it was a happy reunion. one over stories, and food and gifts-- all a surprise to/for me.

when in a rush, make-up has been the normal sacrifice of late.

i couldn't sleep that night. its that feeling of just having had a great night, the buzz of a wonderful evening took a long time to wane, not being in your own bed and the anticipation of an event i would have loved my family to witness but they couldn't.

*

the next day, i received my degree. with second highest honours while my friends and husband looked on with pride.

divine grace

"Happiness is not a goal..it is a by-product of a life well-lived.. "~~Eleonor Roosevelt

Today, silliness with Adrian... visiting the Lavender Farm in Heacham, Norfolk (20 minutes away from our house).