junction

i am at a junction, i said to myself (hands on my hair, almost pulling the remaining wisps on my crown ~~drama queen that i am).

everyday there are spanner thrown in the works. yesterday: it was a sad event, the other day~ a happy one, the day before that~ my mood, today~my health, blimey, the cycle goes on.

cryptic i may sound, but i think i just needed to say these mind puzzles aloud. it goes along the line of trial retirement and business plans in the beautiful island of cebu, but the scared and risk-averse person that i am, i keep bouncing off one plan to the next because in truth i am scared, like the wimp that i am.

personal history told me that i am not good without a plan B, a control of some sort for my neuroses.

i just have that need to know. but on the other hand,a  personal experience remind me that no matter what plans A,B,C or Z are in place, God sometimes surprises us with an alternative alphabet. an Omega or Gamma perhaps.

i cant give away the plans here, but dearest readers, all thousands of you (*sarcasm*) trust that it involves retirement and travelling. its a 2015 plan (you shout "geez,thats years far from now", i know!) but, plans like that revolve and involve decisions and manoeuvring years beforehand. that, or its the mrs. obssesive planner in me who's talking.

last night, the early hours decision was forego retirement, just concentrate on travelling instead of a business plan of shelling money and have the risk of not even be successful at it. see the world before Adrian becomes too mature (read: old ,hehe) from all the early and late airport travels but who am i kidding. I know myself, i am worst as an old bat plagued with mental anguish when i do not have work ritual to go to.

old habits die hard, so you cant blame someone who worked at the age of 17 years (helping the family financially), and suddenly decide to forego any semblance of work will be tragic for my mental wellbeing.

ergo, in conclusion, i am back to square one. not knowing which column of the excel spreadsheet we are following, and have not yet zeroed in on the bullseye.

there are reasons why plans are written in pencil. we're keeping the rubber handy.

{photo: Walsingham town. the Lourdes of England,where an apparition of theVirgin Mary were noted in history }

picnic afternoon

i have promised my family and friends i need to post their pictures which i owe them. they are annoyed at me and they are literally nagging me to rush my ass off and post their pics on FB (because thats where they are).

but, i love my little corner here. i feel happy in my blog, so i cannot pass without posting these pictures here too.

i have just posted these pictures in facebook. one of the few moments i had with my sister when she was here in the uK;-)

taken last April 2010

**

the sister i miss so dearly

our picnic spread

look here, no there, no,here!

my sister found the bread's shape too funny..we bought it in a rush on the way to

the picnic..no,it wasn't a freudian slip at all,LOL;-)

she was looking out in the horizon and whispering 'thanks' for being where she was..and maybe some of her dreams

**

here are some more photos from the digicam

learn from me: when your beauty is 'alanganin' never look miserable.

it will just worsen it,hehe.

oh we all love,Cath

cheese,butter,crackers,chocolates,champagne, salmon and crackers..we're set

she feels happy here;-)

ok, i love this angle,LOL..i remember,i didn't want my photos taken..

oh i miss you little sister..come back na!!;-)

**

PS> my sister moved her blog.. like all of us,she is still finding her blogself..

hopefully,THIS is it.

it's a weighty issue

i must admit, i am at the stage where i don't care about my weight anymore. i am feeling happy and contented with being this weight and being this size. (please don't judge,haha).

i have not been to the shops if i could help it, because i know, id be feeling inadequate again looking at clothes that wouldnt even fit one of my thighs, much more my waistline.

alot of my friends (here) are on a constant diet. when were out, i look at their size 8 frame jealously, and they look at my plate enviously. it takes sacrifice for them to be there, and it takes sheer laziness and unmotivation to be my size.

but in the middle of waiting for my blood results, i was wondering, what if, id die this weight? and my husband has to order an XL coffin? (morbid, but its extremely funny and true).


i would be lying to say, i dont want to be a few sizes smaller (not a size 8 , *cough cough* thats very unrealistic). maybe a size 14UK. but, the truth of the matter is: when youre working 9-5, and weekends are spent for doing chores and catch up, your free time is rather beautifully spent munching on brownies infront of the tv than eating salads and sweating on the stairmaster.


my friend N urged me to go dancing with her again. my friend C wanted me to join her gym which has alot of classes for working people (meaning night aerobics) (my gym has the best classes at the time when im at work).

now if only, i can buy motivation from the nearest store, id buy them by the dozen.


**

Therese H. always comes to mind whenever i want to lose weight: think babies, as motivation.

my best mate Kharla says: think of your fashion indulgence.

my sister Ana would always say: think of the food you can allow yourself to indulge in after losing the weight,hehe. (i know,she celebrates with food, like me)

my friends here would urge me: think of the activities you can do with us (not because im too obese, that i dont do it with them, im just extra careful not to go skydiving and surfing,lest id have a hypo attack,haha).

what is the point of this blogpost really? to explore what other motivation i can kick myself with.


and with that, i have to excuse my wobbly derrier for another slice of home-baked bread and salmon.

**

you know a hopeless case, if you see one.



{photo: if i could run myself, i could run London.photo taken by my cousin K, pre adjusted by me, of course. thank you Lord for autofocus settings..and cropping..somebody can take photos of me using my camera now.}

little house with big memories

Adrian and I were talking about our house back in the Philippines; how we miss it, and how lucky we were to have bought it when the sterling pounds was a higher currency value than what it is now. (we couldn't have afforded a house if we have to buy it now at the rate).


Our house is a tiny two-bedroom house, with a small front garden and a side garage and a balcony. Tiny but it suits us, who initially just wanted a room to go home to.

For the first two times of being home, Adrian and i would rent a condo unit. Just some personal space for him as he feels embarrassed staying at Mama's and Papa's then small house in Linao. Adrian doesn't mind staying at another person's house, but if it has to be in a week, it would be too much tiptoeing for him. I didn't understand that then, because obviously, my parents' house are my parents house, but now i understand him why.

When were there, we like it better when we have people sleeping in the guest room, we normally have my sister over, or my mama, or brothers. We love a house filled with people.

Adrian brought up the topic about our little house today when we were having lunch. How we were lucky to have decided to buy one. Eventhough we have to pay monthly upkeep for the community rates, gardener and such, we were lucky too that the house was fronting a little hill, which they are not putting houses in. As its a subdivision, the houses are quite close to one another, at least were not looking at someone's house. We were lucky alone on that. We are lucky that when papa died, we didn't have to ask people to rush and book condo units for us and we have that extra feeling of home (more for him than me, really) away from home. (I must admit, when i went home on my own, i didn't stay in our house, i stayed at mama's house which was really a great decision).

We miss our house. Not because of the house itself. We miss it because everytime we remember it, we remember it fondly ,full of love and all the parties, the gatherings and the people who come and drop by our little abode, and the many more wonderful years Adrian and i are planning to make in it.

and when were in cebu, you are definitely welcome to come and drop by.

my age matters

sigh, to be young and beautiful...

and yet have the wisdom we have now as our older selves,

life must be rosy..



***

age matters, when you start to forget things

when you start looking at yourself in the mirror

and see more lines than you welcome

and your back can only tolerate a little beating,

and your knees creak for every dance you attempt.


although i would choose my age now over

years before,

and the wisdom over past mistakes,

i am not too proud to admit

i would still want a body like that!

(tongue in cheek) =)



**

{photo: the wonderful Sarah E.}...=)

My dream seminar

Supergirls..all of us..

i love my friends...life is always better when there's you around..

ps..some supergirls are not in the photos..i dont have photos of the others in the US and NZ (lynette, ayen,chichi,fil,normita,etc.)

Ps: some supergirls are not facilitating due to lack of time..but you are definitely joining..the better to just enjoy the moment..=)

i.e...Ate Lou, Tita Wi, Maris, Liza and Jopie..and everyone i havent mentioned..x

***

As most friends know, i am the consummate student. I attend classes, left right and centre, even in the middle of working fulltime, a university degree and a time-consuming hobby=)

Blame it on not having a child and having a husband who believes that 'learning' is a lifelong commitment. The moment he sees me googling classes on the internet, he jumps on the bandwagon and agrees that "that sounds just like you, go for it". Because he is the same. He lectures in a university and teaches in an exclusive 'posh' school because he is tired with slackers wo cant be bothered because their education is free,haha (apart from doing mini courses in Cambridge once in a while). (and yes, this explains the Masters Degree forms i need to fill up by early next year. Again, i blame it on my University dean who sent it out to some of us, my husband found it and somehow is making me lean towards doing it..I so am a masochist!).

So attending seminars/lectures are not new to me, nor will i think i'd ever stop doing it.

I have attended structured seminars and i love them. Even online ones ,i get so much out of it (gosh the friendships and contacts i get from them alone).

So in my head, i have this structured seminar forming in my head. Its not an impossible dream(because i know if people commit to it, it will happen), but it is a dream because the people involved in this are too far away from one another.

This seminar will involve people I know could benefit and would enjoy this day. It will be girl-bonding at the same time and learning something in the process.

Hear me out:

What: The Supergirl Seminar (Maximising Your Supergirl Powers)

Where: In a Beach cottage/or mountain cottage (with seminar room) somewhere in Cebu (where most supergirls are)

Length: 3days 2 night seminar (i wanted it to be a whole week but it wont be feasible for moms, as this seminar will be without our families and entourage).

what to bring: bathing suits/camera/make up kit/writing materials/pyjama and one party dress

***

Programme:

Friday :(Date to be finalised)

6:00 AM -travel to destination

9:00 Am- arrival, and start of seminar (registration,LOl, badges with supergirl names will be given)

9:30 AM- Introduction and welcome speech

-Okay, i will be the one to give the speech because i organised ( and probably sponsor) this (bloody) thing,haha)

9:45 Am- 10:00- snacks : cakes and coffee

---- Lecture Proper---

10:00-12:00 - "Supergirl, who are you?" --a lecture and insight into your supergirl powers

(this is with games/writing and sharing/introductions)

-To be done by..(still thinking about it)--any volunteers?

12:00-1:30-- Buffet Lunch (catered by Kusina Habana)

1:30-3:30 - "Photographs by A Supergirl" --

(basic photography class/learning your camera settings) --and finding your photographic style ( facilitated by Aileen Siroy)

(note: bring your cameras: whether digicam or SlR's all have

settings)

3:30-4:00- snacks/merienda

4:00-6:00 - "The supergirl writes" -Creative writing to be lectured and facilitated by Chin Kong

-writing from a supergirl perspective -

(bring your notes and pencils/interactive exercise on writing/blogging)

6:00-8:00 - free time (enjoy the beach/pool..if in a mountain lodge, nature walking?)..or better yet, practise what you just learnt

8:00- 10:00pm- Welcome dinner buffet and mingling with everyone (any sponsors please?)

10:00-12:00nn-- Parrtyyy

*****

Next day: (Saturday)

6:00AM- mini breakfast (bread and soup/cereals/oatmeals/coffee)

7:00 AM: Supergirl YOGA -- speaking to the Supergirl inside you

(yoga talk/benefits of yoga, and demonstration and facilitation by Mai Pages- Solomon)

9:00-9:30 am -snack (proper breakfast)

10:00-11:00 -free time.. (shower and getting ready for lunch and afternoon lectures)

11:00-12:30 - sit down Lunch - at resort restaurant to allow chatting and discussion

12:30- 2:30-- "Make-up session (Bringing out your Supergirl sparkle)" --

(Basic make up tutorial/coverage/day/night make up).. By Therese H.and Kaith C.

(Note: bring your make up tools ladies )

2:30-3:00-- snacks

3:30- 5:30-- Self-portraiture/ Photographing The Supergirl (lectured and facilitated by Maimai S. and Aileen S.)

In Lectures will share their self portrait tips and how they do it, and what makes self photography a basic Supergirl power (LOL)..plus taking self portraiture exercises

4:30-6:00-- "Karma Sutra Supergirls: unleashing your powers in the bedroom"

Lectures by Patricia V. and Filipinas SJ.

(interactive lecture about what makes a supergirl's man tick in the bedroom, helpful tips and activities to a have a productive Supergirl bedroom)

(note: PG 18--hehe)

6:00-7:30--- free time (changing into pyjamas)

7:30-9:00--Dinner /Pyjama Party (Dinner sponsored by..??)

9:00-10:30-- .Printing out of photos we took and sharing of Supergirl powers.

13:00-12:00 Partyyy

****

Sunday (Last day)

7:00--Breakfast

7:00-9:30 -Packing

9:30-11:300- "Music Appreciation?Translating music into passion"

(facilitated by Jane G. and Filipinas SJ: listening to different music genres and writing/blogging about it..and finding the Supergirl music)

10:00-11:00- Sharing and forum

11:00-12:00 --Graduation/Handing out of certificates and badges

*****

12:00-1:30--Lunch

1:30pm--Head home

**

Note: No one will be driving so no one can come in late and no one can come out of the group in the middle of the sessions and go home. You are either there or not. You are giving yourself a chance to focus and enjoy without any of the usual day-to-day distractions.

To join the seminar, you would have to be committed to the sessions or the seminar will not be a success.

We would have to hire a coach/bus which will take us there and drop us off our respective houses.

We would also have to make sure that its only 10-12 people per seminar to keep within the time frame.

The first year may be just the Supergirls attending because most of it is sponsored , but the next year will be attended by "the public" for a fee on a first reserved,first attend basis so that we could afford to pay the facilitators and the place/materials/etc...we could not afford to sacrifice the quality of the classes by too many people too.

And the power of the internet will make this seminar popular, because everyone would have to blog about it, eh? =)

***

Hopefully, this experience will give us an opportunity to bond (even more), learn more from one another (coz come on, lets face it, as much as we read one another's blog, we still don't know one another that much).

In the case of a public attendee outside the supergirls joining it: it will be a way of meeting like-minded people.

Apart from the above, it will be a way to learn new skills or polish old ones: i.e. photography, writing, journalling, blogging, self actualization, fitness, make up, music and so much more.

This is also a journey to self as the programme will allow, "self" moments and coming back and sharing what you found out by going out (in time) with yourself..

But of course the above are just the Aims and Objectives of this seminar..It is very much structured because if not, we will just waste an expensive weekend away from love ones, without gaining anything from it. We could not afford that as time is precious..Specially time away from love ones.

***

PS: and yes, the programme needs tweaking. i would have wanted to do the following:

a two hour culinary session with Therese Habana as lecturer (the Supercook/and Domestic Supergirl)/

a two hour networking and business facilitation and session with Mimi (the Supergirl networks)/

a book appreciation class with Ayen (Supergirl books and stories)

voice and singing session with Janey (singing acapella/finding your supergirl voice)

A new mom's voice, a Supergirl perspective by Normita (First time Supermoms)

Handwriting and snail mail session with Lynette--maybe posting letters to our superselves/

and painting and sketching session with Patricia and Filipinas (Supergirl art)

Starting Anew--A Supergirls life abroad by Chichi

Fashion with Chin and Kaith (WhatThe Supergirl wears)...

but gosh, i think we need a long vacation for that..LOL

We can rotate the sessions as the current above sessions for the programme were chosen because i thought that theyre what we need and relate mostly to blogging which writing/photography/writing about music/sex-life (duh!)/and fitness (healthy mind and body), were very important as part of the taster sessions..

Maybe in the second year, we could add a Supergirl Seminar part 2 ( which incorporates the other sessions not on the above list), --attended only by those who have done the first seminar..

(whoaaa! lemme stop here).

**

Its free to dream.

And boy do I dream big! =)